Whew, y’all feeling feverish?! Yeah, that’s cuz Kanye West and DJ Khaled just leaked their sick new track “Theraflu" and the interwebz is buzzin’ off their musical medicine (the actual cold remedy isn't feelin' so hot). But you know who’s really gotta be burnin’ up right now? Kris Humphries, the scorned hubby of Kim Kardashian, after hearing Ye spit these tummy-turning lines: “And I’ll admit I fell in love with Kim/ Around the same time she had fell in love with him.”
Yup, there’s a love triangle outbreak, y’all! Kanye, Kim, Kris. And this rap revelation comes on the heels of a contagious rumor that Kanye and Kim are sharing germs after she was recently seen leaving his apt in the same clothes as the night before.
Plus, the Louis Vuitton Don reportedly said about the speedy delivery of the track (it was actually intended for DJ Khaled’s album), “This needs to be out now; this is an urgent record." Sounds like he just had to get somethin’ off his chest…like his love sickness over a still-married reality TV star?!
And the volatile rapper even slings more temperature-raisin’ rhymes at Kris, saying, “Lucky I ain’t have Jay drop him from the team,” referring to the fact that his boy Hovah is part-owner of the Nets, where Humphries currently hoops it up.
Finally, in a possible Prince C(Harming) move, he taunts the radical animal rights group that flour-bombed his precious Kim for her fur-wearing ways with this viral hook: “Can’t a young n---a get money any more/ Tell PETA my mink is draggin’ on the floor”
Clearly, there is something nasty going around, huh? So let’s decide which of these patients suffering from a bad case of Kim congestion deserve your vote. It’s an Act-Off between Kanye and Kris!
+ Kanye is G.O.O.D.
So we know he cares about Kim, but what about the rest of the world? Last year, he found time to auction off a Maybach for charity and visit a veteran. Plus, he announced -- aka flooded his feed with an epic Ye-style Twitter dissertation -- plans to launch a revolutionary summer school as part of his 22-division DONDA empire. No idea if that ish will ever happen, but the Chi-town hip hop star did actually perform at Brad Pitt’s charity gala benefitting his Make It Right Foundation, so that’s healthy. Still, the diagnosis for West’s philanthropic endeavors isn’t all G.O.O.D. -- his personal foundation’s finances are getting’ poked and prodded lately because apparently the org didn’t donate ANY moola last year.
+ Kris Balls So Hard
Aight, we know physically he's in good shape since The Hump stripped to his skivvies for a recent in-your-face fashion shoot, but what about his heart? Kim's former basketball boo showed he had a big one when he made the dreams of a young cancer patient come true by inviting her and her family down for a game -- all expenses paid -- after her friends tweeted Kris how much their sick BFF loved him. He also founded The Kris Humphries Foundation to teach disadvantaged kids about staying fit and living healthy through basketball and education clinics like the ones he's held at the YMCA and Boys and Girls Club of New Jersey and Minnesota. So Kris has caught the do-good flu, but does he get your action over Ye?